I'm so nervous.
I'm just on my way to the clinic. I feel I've gained loads but what if I've lost?
Sure that would make ana happy, but it wouldn't make me happy.
Yes I am scared that I have gained. But today I kinda want to have gained.
Ana is screaming "why are you saying that??" "we want to loose weight!" "we want to be slim and happy!"
But I'm screaming back no!
I want to show everyone I want to get better and I'm trying so hard to do so. And weight gain is the way to do that.
I guess I'm realising I can't ever fully recover without gaining weight. And strangely I'm starting to become okay with that.
Post later hope you're all having a great day :)